My sons are in scouts. My husband is the den leader for #2's group...pack...section...area..whatever. I do not do scouts. It's their thing and I try as hard as I can to not have anything to do with it. The leader of the scout troop is an unpleasant man who is controlling and difficult and very, very serious about how valuable scouting is in the lives of boys. He works very hard to make things great but is one of those people who cannot delegate and does not trust the adults around him to look after the things they are responsible for and treats them like idiots. A couple of weeks ago he sent my husband a truly arseholey email regarding something very small - he used italics for emphasis...seriously...italics. And in the most ridiculous places.
He's a jackass and while I usually have no direct contact with him this morning I went toe to toe with him and I'm going to be in trouble...with my husband.
Last week the boy scouts dropped off bags around the neighbourhood to collect food and clothes for charity - this week they had to pick up the full bags and drop them off at a church. We didn't know the drop off point though and were told to gather at the school to find out where to drop the stuff off. Usually you are assigned certain streets to drop off and pick up - it's not that complicated...and it's the 4th year these boys have been doing it and this group of parents has been doing it. Since one of the parents lives in the neighbourhood it was decided that they'd send one of the leaders to the school to find out where the drop off was and the rest of the group would go to this parent's house and they'd meet there and do the pick up. It's not rocket science.
Unfortunately my husband had to go to Canada this morning for a funeral and the other dad who is the leader had to work this morning so his wife and their four kids were going to just go to the meeting place and I would have to go to the school and find out where the drop off location was....
The leader was late and it was cold this morning (so cold I let the boys wait in the car) and when he showed up he was taking forever to get things started so I went up and asked where the drop off point was - his wife (who is very nice and for the life of me I can't see what she sees in him) said it was at a particular church and that was when I made my mistake. In attempting to reassure him that our group had their act together and we were taking care of the streets we'd been assigned I accidentally told him we were meeting in the neighbourhood and they wouldn't all be coming to the school - so that before he got worried that a whole group was missing, we actually had it all covered and everything would be okay.
It was a major mistake.
He lectured me (and I do mean lectured) on how it doesn't work that way and that in the five years he's been running this organization they always meet at the school before they go out and what if...blah...blah...blah.
A different person would have apologized and let it go but I'm not about to be bullied. So I gave it back. My husband was at a funeral (a funeral...dude...) and that we'd be taking care of the streets we'd been assigned to and that it was taken care of.
It was bad. Like...he was an asshole and I'm sure I was no better...but we're grown ups. He brought up that the den leaders (my husband and the other dad) had been doing it for 4 years and should know how it's done...yeah..they've been doing it for 4 years so they can handle it.
I left it with "We'll be taking care of those streets so you don't need to worry about them..." and I left before the whole big meeting where he could feel all adored and in control started. I met the other parents from our group and told them what I'd done. They thought his reaction was stupid since we were handling the pick up just fine.
While we were driving around doing the pick up this asshat drove around the streets we were doing...he didn't stop but I know he was checking up on us....that kind of controlling.
So, what's the problem? All's well that ends well....right?
The problem is that I will be in trouble with my husband when he finds out. He avoids confrontation at all costs. He will be upset with me for going a round with the leader guy. And since this is his domain and his reputation (he is really the nicest guy ever) he will be worried that he'll have to answer for my behaviour.
I feel a tiny bit guilty for it. I don't give a shit what the leader guy thinks of me but I hate to upset my husband.
I guess I'm not really looking for advice or anything but I'm on my own for the weekend and it's too early to start drinking and it's high time I started acting like myself around here. This place is so Stepfordy it's nuts and I've been trying to fit in...I think I'm done with that.
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